Tuesday, September 30, 2008

CMI: Eagle Eye


"Uh, no, we were just... Okay... Yeah, I got it, I... Oh wait, what? ... Really? ... But it smells so bad and there's all this hair... No, all over... And you still want me to--? ... With my mouth?! ... *sigh* All right... No, it's okay... Love you, too. Bye."





"Eagle Eye promises to blow your mind..., but my mind was already blown."



"I actually feel a little dirty... about this one. "


"The Amish would love it[!]"


"Should this film be a huge box office success, it will stand as a... testament to how... the bar for cinematic entertainment has been set."


"I was waiting for Will Smith to pop up."


"The fever-pitch paranoia of this terrorist thriller, the seizure-inducing editing, the dense layers slapped on a fairly simple plot all point to... money."


"[I]t is like being in a blender."

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

CMI: Babylon A.D.

Future's so bleak I gotta wear shades.




"[B]iblical proportions."

"I found myself sorta not hating it[.]"


"Babylon A.D. isn't the worst big-budget sci-fi film ever made[.]"


"[N]ever less than watchable[!]"

"Babylon A.D. is a... sci-fi melodrama... of excitement or intelligence[.]"


"You know what? I like Vin Diesel."